Wedding Party Issues

Q: When we got engaged a year ago, my fiancé asked if he could have a girl friend of his on his side of the wedding party. I thought that this would be cool as I had seen it done at other weddings. Since then she has been uncooperative and hard to get in touch with. She's negative and I'm getting angry that she gets to go to his stag and to all of the "guy" events when no other women do. It's one month to the wedding and I can't ask her out of the wedding party now or we would lose her as a friend. I feel as if she is going to ruin my wedding, a time when my fiancé and I should be close. What do I do?

A: Sounds like you're in a sticky situation! I have to say that I agree with you....this just doesn't seem appropriate. I would do one of two things:

1. If this lady is going to be a part of the ceremony, this situation shouldn't give her access to the stag party and the other things intended only for the "gentlemen". This seems very inappropriate, and I can see why this would disturb you. Although there's no problem with her participating in the wedding, the pre-wedding festivities should not include her, since they don't include any other women.

2. Another option is to merge your stag and stagette parties into a Jack and Jill party. This is where both the men and the women are in the same room at the same time, and it becomes one mutual party....bride, groom, ushers, bridesmaids, the whole deal happens at once. This way, girls and guys can attend, and the tension will be lessened. It becomes one big party rather than the other way around. This way, the discussion of "men only" and "women only" will be completely eliminated!