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Ten Things You Must Do Before You Say "I Do"
by Five
Star Events Corporation
1. Meet each other's family
Get to know them because they are part of the entire package.
Like the saying goes, "You don't just marry your partner, you marry
his whole family."
2. Meet each other's friends
Spend time with your mate in his or her comfort zone. It might
be the hockey rink, the basketball field, the scrap booking classes, or
even at the mall or gym. If he or she is accustomed to spending free time
at a certain place, or doing a certain activity, it will not change after
you've exchanged vows. And if you expect it to change, you'll be setting
yourself up for a big disappointment.
3. Have "the talk"
Give serious consideration to where you want to be, short and
long term, in your relationship. If your partner said he or she wanted
three kids when you first started dating, see if that is still what they
want. Discuss where you want to live (maybe your new spouse will want
to move to another city?), what you both consider to be your respective
roles in the relationship and as you raise children. Discuss future scenarios.
For example, she might think you should move in with her parents when
they retire in order to support and take care of them, and he might think
you should stay home and raise the children. If you hadn't discussed it
until now, you might be surprised. There are often many ethnic, cultural
and religious differences between couples and different customs, which
may be obvious to one partner, may not be acceptable to the other.
4. Discuss financial goals
Will both of you continue to work after marriage? Will one partner
stay home with the children? If so, which of you will stay at home? It
doesn't necessarily need to be the spouse with the smallest income.
5. Set a budget
Set a budget for the wedding and stick to it. Weddings can be
very costly, and unexpected expenses can come up if you're not prepared.
Spend money on what you feel is most important to you. If, for example,
you want a large guest list, then cut down your food budget by having
an afternoon luncheon or a cocktail party. Or if your priority is to have
an eight-course dinner and your budget won't allow for 500 people, then
you cut down your guest list.
6. Make your own decisions for your wedding
Your wedding day is your day, and you should make the decisions.
Resist the temptation to allow parents and friends to influence your decisions.
Do you really need your mother's boss at your wedding if you don't know
him or her? Go over your guest lists carefully. Selecting vendors is a
personal decision; so don't allow your friend’s neighbor’s cousin’s stepson
to be your photographer or caterer unless you know he or she will be your
best choice.
7. Review all vendor contracts
Make sure there are no possibilities for error on your wedding
day. Give the limo driver a map for pick up and drop off locations. Review
the florist's contract to see if it includes delivery, and maybe alternate
arrangements if your specific flowers aren’t in "wedding day"
shape. Discuss with the photographer before hand what pictures should
be taken.
8. Review details with your Emcee
Review your evening schedule with your emcee and ask him or her
to stick to it closely. And ensure names are pronounced properly by providing
a list of names (i.e. priests, out-of-town guests) in advance. Best-case
scenario, either you or your partner will meet with the Emcee in advance
and verbally practice the correct pronunciation of each name. Sometimes
they are obvious… sometimes, they are not.
9. Get a marriage license
If it is a provincial requirement, get a marriage license and
bring it with you to the ceremony. This is an important task that easily
gets forgotten.
10. Smile!
Solve dry mouth problems by smearing a little Vaseline petroleum
jelly on your teeth (sounds yucky, but it works). Your family and guests
will be taking many photos of your wedding that will be in the family
for generations.
11. Relax
Enjoy your special day. Your wedding day memories will stay with
you for the rest of your life. Proper planning, staying within a budget
and staying true to who you are as a couple will produce wonderful results.
If something does go wrong, there’s nothing you can do about it at the
time. A portion of your budget should be allotted to hiring a wedding
planner, and he or she will take things under control so you won’t even
know when there’s a problem.
Five
Star Events Corporation
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