How to Elope

Q: Here is our problem. We want to get married soon but our families are kind of a pain and we don't really want them at the wedding. My girlfriend gets really anxious when we start discussing guestlists and things like this. We do have some pretty weird relatives and we don't want them to come to the wedding but we don't want to hurt anyone's feelings either. If we elope and not tell anyone, is this rude? Will our parents be mad at us? Also, will we still be able to get gifts. I know that sounds rude but we don't EVER ask for anything so we feel it is our time to get a little something. What can we do? We were also thinking of eloping and then having some kind of party later so our families won't be so upset with us. Help us....!!! We are used to our families being total tweakers because we have been together for 5 years. We just want a fun time with no drama. Thanks.

A: This is a great question, and trust me when I say you're not the only one with this problem! I have to begin by saying that you will never please everyone. Regardless of what decision you make regarding eloping or not eloping, someone is sure to be upset, so just focus on what YOU want, rather than what you think your family does. That said, it sounds like you're leaning towards eloping, and if you do, you may want to consider telling your parents that you are planning to elope so that they don't feel insulted and "left out" like you did something "behind their backs". This may be something you want to consider. If you are able to leave and elope, then once you are legally married, sure - you can definitely throw a party to celebrate with your friends and family. And yes, you can certainly expect to receive gifts! You may also want to send invitations to the party....the more formal you make the party, the more likely it is that people will come bearing gifts!

I hope this helps you out a bit!